Rainy Season Strategies

Avoiding humidity…
Hiroshi: You sleep like a cat, curled up, 
Hiroko: I nap a lot in the rainy season.
Hiroshi: I don’t sleep. 
Hiroko: And you don’t drink enough water.
Hiroshi: It’s rainy season. I osmose. Take in water through my skin.
Hiroko: How about summer in Hokkaido. Dry air, clean breezes.
Hiroshi: Ah, Hokkaido, I would reinvent myself. Drinking milk instead of water. Staying at a farm, where kind farmers give me miso ramen and a wool sweater.
Hiroko: Sweaters in summer?
Hiroshi: Hokkaido summers are mild. Perfect for light wool. Functional. Cozy. And you will have less need for napping.
Hiroko: But who will take care of the cat?
_________
Voice-over
Hokkaido being further north than Honshu with its hot humid summers, does have a cooler, more temperate climate, and no distinct rainy season. Might be worth trying for a summer. (Nemuri Neko by Hidari Jingorō).

Afterlife as a Cat

A reincarnation conversation…

Mariko: If I had other lives, I think being a cat would suit me quite well. Curious, contemplative, occasionally mischievous, and long staring sessions out of windows. Why do you ask?

Daniel: It’s Haru. I get the feeling when she is gazing intently at me that she is probing my thoughts. Like she’s changing my personality and may be grooming me to be a cat in the afterlife.

Mariko: She does that. She told me she knows things about my afterlife already.

Daniel: How did she tell you that?

Mariko: Telepathy, what else? Do you mind being reincarnated as a cat?
Daniel: I don't mind being a cat if the owners are caring, but if I was reincarnated as a street cat, my present self balks at the challenges that would present.
Mariko: Yeah, street cats live on a knife edge, navigating hunger, weather, and the unpredictability of people. And yet… maybe there’s something to admire in their fierce spirit too. 
Daniel: Meeting Haru, beyond this life, now THAT would be an amazing event if I were also a cat. I wonder how we would communicate. Blinks and tail flicks?

__________

Voice-over
Haru stretches and walks to Mariko. Flicks her tail and blinks. 
In the dusk-lit room
old souls meet with silent eyes
one slow, perfect blink.

A sulky cat

What about ME?

A cat chat…
Alice: She’s usually very affectionate and friendly. However, yesterday, I had some guests over for lunch and I locked her in the bedroom so she wouldn't escape outside. After the guests left, she seemed really annoyed and didn’t stop flicking her tail for an hour. 
Zaha: Cats can be quite sensitive to changes. They don’t like having their routine upset for one.
Alice: Yeah, she’s a creature of habit.
Zaha: And she might think guests coming in are invaders of her territory. Bringing different sounds and smells.
Alice: So I could have introduced her to them, you think?
Zaha: That would help. You have to adjust to cat behavior speed.
_________

Voice-over
So introduce her to the guests then later put her in her favorite room, with some treats as reward. Some cats like attention.

Winter Weight Gain

Stubborn winter weight loss…

Samantha: How’s the weather treating you?

Victoria: So up and so down. One day hot, one day cold. And I can’t control my comfort foods.

Samantha: Binging?

Victoria: Not binging but I’m putting on weight.

Samantha: You've got nothing to worry about. You always look fabulous!"

Victoria: Seriously. Six kilos up in six months.

Samantha: Mmm. Hard to stay active when it's freezing outside. And in cold weather, our bodies crave more calories, even if we're not using them all.

Victoria: I’ve tried indoor exercises.

Samantha: It’s got to be sustained. And vigorous. Have you tried dance?

___________

Voice-over

Dance, aerobics, tai chi, they all help. It’s harder than when we were younger.

Catsitting

Visiting a house with cats...

Eleanor: We have two cats.
Rachel: I thought you only had one?
Eleanor: We’re catsitting one more while the owners move house.
Rachel: They get along?
Eleanor: Took a couple of days. Now they sit together on top of the bookcase. See?
Rachel: Catsitting you, right?
________
Voice-over
Wise to have a friends catsit a feline, house-moving is a time of upheaval.

Cat GPT

Human: Sylvester, are you a cat or a catbot?

Sylvester Catbot: Purr. Meow! While it's pawsible that I could be a regular cat, I am actually a catbot programmed to sound like a feline.

Human: Do you have a friend called Tweety?

Sylvester Catbot: Growl! Meow, I am an AI language model and I do not have furiends in the traditional sense. However, there are many pawsibilities for us to talk about Tweety and explore the topic further.

Human: OK. Do cats like to eat birds?

Sylvester Catbot: Growl! Meow, there are pawsibilities that some cats enjoy eating birds as it is in their feline nature to hunt and chase their prey. However, not all cats have the same taste as some may prefer other types of food. Meow.

Human: Can a cat be trained to not eat birds and instead enjoy eating vegetables?

Sylvester Catbot: As an AI language model, I am not a cat and do not have the ability to reply like one. However, cats are carnivores and require meat in their diet to stay healthy. It is unlikely for a cat t
o enjoy eating vegetables and not have an urge to hunt birds. This is a natural instinct that is difficult to train out of them. Nonetheless, I think it's pawsome that you are looking out for the wellbeing of the birds.

___________

Voice-over

So the cats, or at least cat-lovers, have already riffed off Chat GPT.

How do Cats Think?

The cat sat on the lap…

What are you THINKING?

Cat Emotion: Nice warm place. Happy. (Blink, blink, purr)

Human Inner Voice: Pussy cat, I gotta go to the loo. (Moves)

Cat Emotion: Are you going to attack me?

Human Inner Voice: Are you going to attack me?

Cat Emotion: Or shall we just play? (Swipe, Swipe, claws retracted).

Human Inner Voice: OK. (Plays boxing).

Cat Emotion: Boring. (Lies down, belly up)

Human Inner Voice: Is this play, or fight?

Cat Emotion: Fight (claws extended, swipe, swipe, back legs kick)

_________

Voice-over

In the space of seconds this cat’s emotions go from happy to fun to boredom to anger. Feline volatility.

Feline kinesics and proxemics

Academic justification for an affective allegiance…

Victoria: Why keep a cat? Can’t take them for a walk. Not like a dog.

Where they sit...

Florence: You can use a leash to train them.

Victoria: They’re contrary and moody.

Florence: True. But you need to read their moods. And they can change from being sulky to affectionate really quickly. Unlike some humans who take days.

Victoria: And they can’t speak. Dogs at least bark.

Florence: You need to learn cat kinesics. Their body language. Eye contact. Blinking. Head butts. Gentle biting. Playing. And reading their proxemics.

Victoria: Their what?

Florence: Where they sit. Who they look at. And sometimes they turn their back and look the other way.

Victoria: Aha. That sounds like expressing their discontent.

Florence: Well, annoyance and sulkiness.

_____________

Voice-over

Kinesics: the study of body movements as proposed by Ray Birdwhistell. Proxemics: the study of space and positioning described by Edward T. Hall.

Pet shop a warm haven

Heat seeking conversation…

Anastasia: It was cold this morning. Something about zero. Feels colder.

Boris: Yes, the heating was off in my study. Broken.

Anastasia: So what did you do?

Boris: Found a pet shop. 

Anastasia: You went to a PET SHOP?

Boris: Warm in there. Can’t let the little animals die.

Anastasia: Didn’t they chase you out? 

Boris: Nobody there. I was in the cat basement. Nice little animals. Talked to an Egyptian and a Singapuran.

_________

Voice-over

Tempting in Covid times, being indoors, to get a pet for companionship…

Iriomote but not an Iriomotean

A new cat in the garden…

Come any closer and I'll hiss

Sakura: What do you call him?

Haruko: Iriomote.

Sakura: But he’s not an Iriomotean.

Haruko: Well, he’s a wild cat and he looks a bit like an Iriomote cat.

Sakura: Wild?

Haruko: Sure. The only time he speaks is to hiss. Even when I give him food.

Sakura: You don’t give him much.

Haruko: I supplement his rats, frogs, birds and lizards diet.

wildcatsmagazine.nl

Sakura: His markings are not quite Iriomotean.

Haruko: No, he’s sort of mottled grey and brown coloring like an Iriomote cat. But his ears, they’re more pointed and the Iriomote cat’s ears are rounded, like a leopard’s.

_________

Voice-over

Something of a feline curiosity looking like a Felis catus domesticus but sharing characteristics with wild cats like leopards, the Prionailurus bengalensis iriomotensis is a critically endangered species.

Amaterasu Cat

Trading up a cat…

.

Mariko: I want a Burmese. Ginger looks too ordinary.

.

Arisa: Keep the ginger cat. They’re strong and friendly. Sometimes even battle cats. Pedigree cats can be a lot of bother. Fussy. Even stuck up. I saw an ad the other day for someone wanting a pedigreed Burmese. One with papers. Then the seller wrote back saying, I have a pedigreed Burmese for sale with papers. But you must send us your ancestry papers if you want to adopt this Burmese. She doesn’t want to live with a mixed breed human.

.

Mariko: No!

.

Arisa: Yes, well, I might have seen it on one of those cat sites. Maybe Catnip.

__________

Voice-over

Amaterasu Ginger Cat

Anomalies in the notion of being purebred. Modern Burmese cats are descendants from one female cat called Wong Mau brought from Burma to the US in 1930s and bred with American Siamese. Most Japanese are descendants from the Sun Goddess Amaterasu and bred with Chinese and Koreans.

...

End of Year Reading

Cat reading tastes…

Mara: Any suggestions on what books to take to the beach?

Bao: Pack your Kindle. Randomly select.

Mara: What have you been reading lately?

I also purchased
Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents

Bao: Well, there are heaps, but Adam Sisman’s John le Carré: The Biography, Anthony Doerr’s All the Light We Cannot See, and Terry Pratchett’s Small Gods: Discworld are the purchased ones I keep turning back to from the hundred-odd downloaded free samples…

Mara: That is so you. Downloading hundreds of samples and rarely making the commitment to buy the full book.

___________

Voice-over

And where do we get our suggestions? New York Review of Books. The Guardian. The Economist.

Happy New Year for 2016.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

(attributed to Lincoln, but some say Thackeray)

…

Cat Meeting Agenda

Cat Meeting Agenda

1. Fish

2. More Fish

3. Extreme Fish with Cream

_______________

Voice-over

Cat meetings share characteristics of academic faculty meetings (in agenda topics and personalities of participants).
...

Believers, beholders and bretheren

Pinknose finds himself lodging with the converted.

...

Tabby One: He has a good voice and a quiet power. We must follow Him.

Tabby Two: I’ll follow him if He throws down fish again.

Pinknose: Just my luck. Finding myself in a Fundamentalist dormitory. Better keep my head down and my opinions to myself.

_______________

Voiceover

Believers exhort us to believe, but doubters sometimes remain silent.

It seems to Pinknose that believers come right out and say they do (believe) while he silently grumbles he isn’t among his bretheren.

While we can admire the light in the eyes of the feline beholders, we can also respect Pinknose’s restraint.

Thanks to lolcats for the backdrop.

…

After diagnosis

Barry visits Leo who had a somewhat traumatic visit to the vet two days ago.

...

Barry: You have a lucky face, Leo. I’m not just saying that like some Indian fortune teller. I mean it. You made a lot of people happy, you made a lot of people laugh. You were a YouTube star.

Leo yawns.

Tired? Well, no doubt it’s the medicine. Let’s just hope… You feel a bit more comfortable after the prednisone? Did you understand what the vet said?

Leo looks up.

We’ll do our best. Medicine. Food, whatever you like to eat. And let’s just hope. You never know. Do our best to put ourselves at the tail of the bell curve. That could mean several months.

Leo settles closer.

That’s it. Nice to just sit close.

Ten minutes of silence pass.

Will say this for you. You are a good listener.

___________

Voiceover

How to talk to a dying cat? What to say? Maybe it’s not so different to talking to dying human being. H-E-L-P.

...

Naming a cat

Annabelle advises Gretchen on naming her new resident.

...

Gretchen: No idea what to call him.

Annabelle: The naming of cats is… how did it go?

Gretchen: A difficult matter.

Annabelle: He looks like Hodge.

Gretchen: Who?

Annabelle: Samuel Johnson’s cat. Hodge.

Gretchen: Hodge. Hmm. He looks like a Hodge.

__________

Voiceover

Annabel and Gretchen, leaning out of a Dutch Renaissance window, raise questions. How far back does the naming of cats go? Did the Dutch name their cats? Did the Egyptians? If so, what principles did they follow? Were they aware that cats have their own names for other cats? And do cats give names to humans around them, like Fooder or Kicker. To be sure, T.S. Eliot wasn’t the first to ponder the question.

The naming of cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter
When I tell you a cat must have three
different names.

First of all, there's the name
that the family use daily,
Such as Victor, or Jonathan,
George or Bill Bailey--
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names
if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen,
some for the dames;
Such as Plato, Admetus,
Electra, Demeter--
But all of them sensible everyday names.

But I tell you,
a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that is peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he
keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers,
or cherish his pride?

Of names of this kind,
I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quazo or Coripat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellyrum--
Names that never belong
to more than one cat.

But above and beyond
there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you will never guess;
The name
that no human research can discover--
But The Cat Himself Knows,
and will never confess.

When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought,
of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

…

Fearless Mouse

William S. and Christopher M. discuss science at the Globe.

...

William: Forsooth, did you mark where the Royal Physician disabled fear in a mouse?

Christopher: I did, though methinks it was not too taxing though, was not all he did was to stuff the mouse’s snout with balm?

William: Simple words make ornamental sentences. Simple science can spark an invention. What if we were able to modify human behavior through the sweets that grocers sell?

Christopher: William, you lag. They do it already. My humours stay balanced by imbibing nightshade, and my doctor, his name is Faust, believe you not, he stopped his age at three score by taking dried toad, sage and vinegar. Old Nick is unsatisfied yet.

...